Tuesday, December 12, 2006

I Need HELP

I am truly at my wits end. Either that or I am the worlds worst mommy. Sierra-Lynn is hurting and I can't do anything to make it better.

Alright, let me start at the beginning. When she woke up this morning, she was bawling. She then tells me that she doesn't want to celebrate Christmas, EVER. So, like any good mom would do, I asked her why. That only set off more tears.

After holding her for at least 15 minutes (most of which she spends trying to get away from me), she finally tells me why she doesn't want to have Christmas. It is because Papa is not here, she doesn't want to do it without him. Bless her little heart. Anyway, after she tells me this, she looks up at the ceiling and yells (I swear as loud as she can) "I hate Papa."

I know that she doesn't. I know that she is just upset. What I don't know (and feel that I need to) is how to make her be okay with him being gone. I don't know how to make her see that he didn't want to die. I don't want her to hurt anymore, and I don't know how to keep it from happening. So, like I said, I must be the worlds worst mommy. Mommys are supposed to know these things, aren't they?

So, please, if you know how to help, leave a comment, email, call, write, or hell send up a smoke signal. Yes, yes, I know, I'm supposed to be watching what I say (or in this case write), sorry it happens.

1 comment:

Juli said...

I think Miss Sierra needs to be reminded how very much her papa loved Christmas and everything it stands for, make sure she knows that even if he can't be here with her he still loves her very much and that he needs her to celebrate Christmas the best way she knows how...so that he has something to smile down on. For a little one, understanding death is very hard-but they still go through all the steps we go through as adults. You're doing a great job...so don't get discouragad--Christmas is a time for family...and she still has one that loves her very much--now would probably be a good time to start talking about all the good times she had with Papa--it may help. Good luck, it won't be easy...my prayers are with you and I know you can handle this!!!