In the spirit of the day, I'd like to say what I am thankful for this holiday season. First I'm thankful for a wonderful and loving husband, and for my sweet (when she wants to be) :) little girl. I'm also thankful for my friends, both old and new, but what I am most thankful for this year is that it is coming to a close. 2006 was one of the worst years in my life and that is saying a lot considering all that I have been through in my life. Here's to 2007 being a better year, with more time with family and friends, with more time for love and more time for fun. Because what is life without family, friends, love and fun. Its nothing more than a way to pass the time.
In tradition with the way I have done this blog I would like to tell a little something about my life. (Yes, I use this as a form of therapy, deal with it.) This time I would like to go back before I met Mark, back to shortly after high school graduation. For me college was not an option, I would have done good, but there just was no money for it. So, I did the next best thing, or so I thought, I signed up with the US Navy. I know what you are thinking, why would anyone want to do that? Well, the cold hard truth is it got me away from my sister and her kids. It didn't last long though. Two weeks before I was set to leave for basic, I got the living daylights beat out of me by my sister's boyfriend.
While at boot camp I had major pains in my back (they have never gone away) and was feeling a lot out of place. Anyway, one of the first things that you do is undergo a mental evaluation (the physical is before you sign your contract). Let's just say I didn't pass. I was sent to speak with their head shrink (pardon the pun). After more testing, on the computer, I was told that me and the Navy was not going to happen. Truth be told I wasn't to broken up about it. What I was upset about was the other thing that he told me. I suffer from depression, sure, and the Easter bunny lives with Santa at the North Pole. Of course, he wasn't wrong, shrinks usually aren't.
Well, that's it for today. Time to play Deal or No Deal.
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I learned something this last week that I had never really thought of before, and I wanted to share it with you. Everyone has something in their life that is, what society would consider, broken. And most people hide that part of their lives, either from shame or because they don't want it to be a reality. You have chosen to share those parts of your life that are broken. I think that just like in Judges chapter 7 when Gideon and his army broke the glass jars so that the light inside could be used what it was intended for, the light inside of us can't really be used until we are broken...because how can we really see God working in our lives if life never gets a little out of control? It is amazing to me, Buffie, that out of the darkness and the challenges that you have had in your life, you are able to overcome...and today you are a wife and a mommy and a friend. I think it is beautiful...You are allowing God to shine through what some would consider a broken life, and it has been a blessing for me to be involved in. Thank you!
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